Sunshinelittleone's Blog

All about my love for the Lord

When Ordinary is Perfectly Extraordinary…

English: The Fairy of Eagle Nebula. Français :...

English: The Fairy of Eagle Nebula. Français : La Fée de la Nébuleuse de l’Aigle (Eagle Nebula). (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

There is an innate human sense to be needed. We long to serve, care and love others. Our worth, although it shouldn’t be, is often times measure by who needs us and how much. When we put our value in the hands of other equally fallen human beings we run the risk of unwanted hurt.  We have all experienced this…being the one who is needed and the one needing. I really think it is

perfectly human…but not of God. He wants us to love each other and care for each other and encourage each other, but He commands us to depend fully on Him for our value and worth.

Our value is in Christ alone. His precious blood gives us life eternal.

I am learning to seek Him for approval. I am learning to seek Him for comfort and grace. I am learning to seek Him when I am vulnerable and my tendencies are to seek strength elsewhere. I am learning that in Christ alone I am free.

My plate, or rather my platter, has been heaping with activity. I have been over-wrought with doing and being and tasking. I have sought value in the doing. I have lost sight, unfortunately, of my worth in the Lord. I have begun measuring my worth by how I am doing, how I make other’s feel and how well I am performing. This is so wrong. My life is not a ledger of ‘to-dos’. My life is a song to the Lord. For a moment I forgot the Words.

When we forget our value in Christ we tend to put our value in things that don’t exist. We begin to build scenarios and story lines that take us out of our ordinary. But, our ordinary, when we really survey it, is extraordinary and exactly what the Lord has planned for us. He makes all things good… including our day ins and outs. Our perfectly God-ordered lives are designed to refine and grow us in Him. He gives us gifts of grace and mercy…such undeserving grace and mercy.

So, as I survey my perfectly ordinary life of a mother and a wife and a friend, I see extraordinary gifts of majestic God moments. I see a husband who is Godly and unconditional in his love, his provision and his encouragement. I see two children who strive to seek the Lord in all they do. They want to please and serve and love.  I see Him filling me with the Fruit of the Spirit. He gives me gifts of Joy and Peace and Patience and Love and Goodness and Kindness. He encourages me to be Faithful in His Word and Works. He gives me extra measures of Self-Control when I am devoid. He is abundant in my ordinary. And yet, when I try to make my life different and extraordinary from what He has planned, from His path, I lose sight of Him. I depend on me and those who I seek value from. And when I repent of my fantastical ‘what if’ life, I am covered in His grace and mercy and my everyday life seems brighter and more beautiful than any fantasy life I could ever dream up!

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In and Out…

Breaths Illuminated

Breaths Illuminated (Photo credit: Dunnock_D)

Just breathe. I have to remind myself of that often throughout the day.  I have to remind myself to enjoy the moments of each day and stop rushing them and ticking them of my endless, eternal, ‘to-do’ list…As though my life is one big task. It’s not- well- I don’t think it is.  Life should not be a task or taxing…it is meant to be loved and lived and breathed through.

I love to run. I love to walk. I love to hike. When asked what I want to do for leisure, my most common response is walk…or hike. For Mother’s Day I have invited my family to take me hiking in the woods. I can’t wait. I need a respite from suburbia. I need to feel the organic crunch of a trail beneath my feet. It seems in those moments I breathe best. Breathing in the pure, God-smells. I love the mixed scent of brackish water and Cyprus. Combined they are a fragrance un-equated by man. I am able to breathe.

I have a ton on my plate on any given day… I am a wife. A mother.  A rookie homeschool momma. I am a baseball team mom (and avid fan I might add). A volunteer. A church lady. I am a friend. A confidant. I am not extraordinary or different than anyone of my contemporaries. We are all women of great courage trying desperately to live honorable and productive lives…lives that give meaning and significance. And, while to some, the notion to remember to breathe would be preposterous, sometimes it isn’t until the end of the day when my body seems to decompress from all of the activity that I am able to finally take a full, lung filling breath.

I am learning as I read through the Word that in order that I may truly see the significance of each joyful moment, each cross I bear, each step I take in God’s grace, sometimes I need to step away from it all to catch my breath. To take in a cleansing breath. It feels so good.

Breathing is related to perspective. When we are out of breath we feel the clutch of fear and anxiety. When our load is light and fresh we ‘breathe easy’. When our children are making crazy and running wild we encourage them to ‘take a breath’.

When I breathe in the goodness of the Lord, I am breathing in grace and mercy and forgiveness and love. I am filled with air so pure. I am filled with Him. He helps my lungs open to their maximum capacity. He is the breath of life.

I have a plaque in my home that reads, “Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away.” These measurable moments of breathing are not just the joyful, but the ones that leave our chest heaving. The Lord uses all our life circumstances to oxygenate our lifeless bodies. He gives each moment a way of refining and shaping us for His story. He has created in us a desire to breathe in His majesty. He is abundant and life-giving.

Breathe, beloved.

Breathe in the moment by moment of each day…The stifling breath, the easy breath, the moments that take your breath away.

Just breathe.

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The Wildflower…

IMG_0007

Living in this world but not being of it. WOW! That’s a tall order.

I am learning as I walk in Christ’s amazing grace that I am to walk in His abundance and not the abundance of this world. I am learning that by choosing to live fully in Him, I am walking securely on paths of righteousness. Not my own self-righteousness, but His righteousness. That still small voice that urges me to dig deep into His heart and to live for Him and His ways. To deny self and live abundantly in His truth. To live ‘not of this world’.

I am reading this amazing little book. It’s a classic. I don’t know why it has taken me so long to discover, but it has come at just the right time. I am not even a third of the way into the book, and yet the gems I am unearthing in the text are transforming me and encouraging me and helping me to wage a battle against self and clothe myself in the Armor of the Lord. The story is of Much-Afraid and her journey to High Places. She is being led by The Shepherd, who promises to never leave or forsake her. Sound familiar?

I was taken breathless by her questions about the wild flowers that grow for no one to enjoy. I have often wondered the same. Why does beauty occur where no one can appreciate it? I wonder, did the Lord create hidden beauty to balance out the sin and pain he bears witness to each moment?

So, in being taken breathless by her wondering about wildflowers, I am rendered speechless by The Shepherd’s response…

“I must tell you a great truth, Much-Afraid, which only the few understand. All the fairest beauties in the human soul, its greatest victories, and its most splendid achievements are always those which no one else knows anything about, or can only dimly guess at. Every inner response of the human heart to Love and every conquest over self-love is a new flower on the tree of Love.
“Many a quiet, ordinary, and hidden life, unknown to the world, is a veritable garden in which Love’s flowers and fruits have come to such perfection that it is a place of delight where the King of Love himself walks and rejoices with his friends. Some of my servants have indeed won great visible victories and are rightly loved and reverenced by other men, but always their greatest victories are like the wild flowers, those which no one knows about
. Learn this lesson now, down here in the valley, Much-Afraid, and when you get to the steep places of the mountains it will comfort you.”

Hinds Feet on High Places

 

We all wage battles of self. Our victory is in Christ and following His will for our lives. They are silent victories to be shared between you and the Lord. The battles and the victories draw us closer to His heart. He delights in our obedience. He will fill us with His strength and endurance.  He helps us to live not of this world, but of His kingdom.

Be drawn in by The Shepherd, Jesus Christ, who is our greatest champion and our ultimate comforter. He created us for LOVE. We are the flowers of His garden. Bloom in the goodness of the Lord, beloved.

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I am not her…Yet…

A Virtuous Woman

A Virtuous Woman (Photo credit: Becky F)

I am intrigued by the Proverbs 31 woman. There has been a great deal of discussion recently about this extraordinary woman of God. She has qualities that all women should aspire to achieve. Her character is exemplary. She is willing to rise early to care for her family. Her children and husband call her blessed. She is wise and faithful in what she says. She is not idle, but rather, she works diligently and earnestly. She is of great value in the eyes of all who love her. She smiles at her future…

A question, of late, has been raised…”Why is she smiling at her future?” “What makes her smile at her future?” I can’t get this out of my mind.

This woman is seemingly full of grace. She loves well and works hard. We all know her.

I long to be her. I long to be considered a Proverbs 31 woman. But, it’s a tall order, and for every amazing act she does in the name of the Lord, I am probably undoing equal amounts. There are most likely days when the Lord shakes His head in astonishment at my actions and thoughts. He has placed her on my heart this week…perhaps in an effort to refine me and create in me a spirit of diligence and obedience.

It’s funny, no matter how hard we work to be Godly and upright and take special measures to be ‘good’…we ALL fall short of the grace of God. And, while I am not entirely “ok” with that, I am grateful for His Amazing Grace. His deep LOVE for me…for you. I am awed by His SACRIFICE of His one and Only; the One who took my sin to the cross and washed it clean in the blood of the Lamb. I am grateful.

So, I wake up to a new day. I will keep my eyes on God and (try with all my might) to walk humbly in His will for my life. I will look to the Proverbs 31 woman, not as a perfect woman, but rather as an example of a woman who gives her very best in living for and glorifying the Lord. I will humbly repent when I am not in line with the Lord’s will. I will rejoice when I am obedient, because it is His self-control and discipline that creates in me a desire to stay on the narrow path to His heart.

Beloved, we are in this together. We are, as I wrote recently, here to love and learn. We must love Jesus well; love others as we love ourselves. We must ask forgiveness and be forgiving…of others and ourselves. We must rejoice in the divine presence of our Savior who lights upon our hearts and makes our conscience tender and repentive.

Don’t wallow in the misgivings of your day. It’s not great when we are sharp tongued or hassled by the demands of our lives, but it is great that we serve a Lord who is quick to forgive and set in us a desire to do better.

In my interpretation, this wonderful woman of Proverbs 31 is not a new bride. She is a mature woman who has lived a long and refining life. She has suffered and rejoiced many a day. She has been through a multitude of obstacle and challenge. She smiles, why? Because through it all she is loved and loves the Lord. She knows that her reward is not on earth, but rather on the eternal riches of Heaven. Amen.

Proverbs 31:10-31

Amplified Bible “A capable, intelligent, and [a]virtuous woman—who is he who can find her? She is far more precious than jewels and her value is far above rubies or pearls. The heart of her husband trusts in her confidently and relies on and believes in her securely, so that he has no lack of [honest] gain or need of [dishonest] spoil.  She comforts, encourages, and does him only good as long as there is life within her. She seeks out wool and flax and works with willing hands [to develop it]. She is like the merchant ships loaded with foodstuffs; she brings her household’s food from a far [country].  She rises while it is yet night and gets [spiritual] food for her household and assigns her maids their tasks. She considers a [new] field before she buys or accepts it [expanding prudently and not courting neglect of her present duties by assuming other duties]; with her savings [of time and strength] she plants fruitful vines in her vineyard. She girds herself with strength [spiritual, mental, and physical fitness for her God-given task] and makes her arms strong and firm. She tastes and sees that her gain from work [with and for God] is good; her lamp goes not out, but it burns on continually through the night [of trouble, privation, or sorrow, warning away fear, doubt, and distrust]. She lays her hands to the spindle, and her hands hold the distaff. She opens her hand to the poor, yes, she reaches out her filled hands to the needy [whether in body, mind, or spirit]. She fears not the snow for her family, for all her household are doubly clothed in scarlet. She makes for herself coverlets, cushions, and rugs of tapestry. Her clothing is of linen, pure and fine, and of purple [such as that of which the clothing of the priests and the hallowed cloths of the temple were made]. Her husband is known in the [city’s] gates, when he sits among the elders of the land. She makes fine linen garments and leads others to buy them; she delivers to the merchants girdles [or sashes that free one up for service]. Strength and dignity are her clothing and her position is strong and secure; she rejoices over the future [the latter day or time to come, knowing that she and her family are in readiness for it]! She opens her mouth in skillful and godly Wisdom, and on her tongue is the law of kindness [giving counsel and instruction]. She looks well to how things go in her household, and the bread of idleness (gossip, discontent, and self-pity) she will not eat. Her children rise up and call her blessed (happy, fortunate, and to be envied); and her husband boasts of and praises her, [saying], [b]Many daughters have done virtuously, nobly, and well [with the strength of character that is steadfast in goodness], but you excel them all. Charm and grace are deceptive, and beauty is vain [because it is not lasting], but a woman who reverently and worshipfully fears the Lord, she shall be praised! Give her of the fruit of her hands, and let her own works praise her in the gates [of the city]!

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Love and learn…

Love Story

Love Story (Photo credit: JeremyHall)

I saw a sweet, kindred spirit yesterday. She and I have not known each other long, or really all that well, but our hearts are knitted together in a deep love and faith in the Lord. We long to be in the arms of Jesus, we know that He holds us tight and secure.

My friend and I were talking about our fallen, human-condition. She encouraged me and told me that I am blessing. I have a light about me. I appreciated her compliment and can attribute it to only one thing…Jesus. He fills me each day with His amazing grace. He sets me on the Rock that is His Word. To all of my sweet friend’s compliments I replied, “Oh, I am broken.” Aren’t we all? Truly, until we are in the Throne of God in His heavenly kingdom, we will remain broken. But, not unfixable.

My friend shared with me that we are here on earth for two purposes…to love and learn. I agree.

I try with all my might to love well. Even the unlovable. Because that’s what Jesus did. He loved. He may not have always liked or approved of what those He loved were doing, but He loved. I want to be like that. I pray that each day He fills me with the Fruit of His Spirit. Love, being the bowl, cradles all of the other Fruit so tenderly.  When I love I am filled with peace and patience. When I love, I am joyful and kind. I am able to speak gentle words and set my sights on the goodness of the Lord. In loving, my faith increases and I feel the presence of our Lord settling deep into my heart. Most of all, love helps me to be self-controlled. It helps me to resist temptation. When I feel tempted to be unkind or filled with strife, love bubbles out and extinguishes my desires to be anything but a servant of the Lord’s peace.

I am learning. Each day is filled with immeasurable opportunities to learn. We are created to glean wisdom and knowledge. We are created to learn the Word of God…and It’s mighty power to keep us on the straight and narrow path to His heart. I don’t always like the learning process, often times it is difficult and refining. More often than not, it draws me away from what my heart desires, but in the end, through the uncomfortable growing pains, I become wiser in the Lord’s desire for my life.

“So, if you think you are standing firm, be careful that you don’t fall. No temptation has seized you except what is common to man. And God is faithful; He will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear.  But when you are tempted, He will also provide a way out so that you can stand up under it.” 1Corinthians10:12,13

I will be grateful in my brokenness. I will rejoice when the Lord corrects me and turns my heart from the things of this world to Him. I will bask in thanksgiving when the path I am on seems rocky and I become weary and worn. But, He takes my tired and nearly extinguished self and makes me bright and new…a new creation in His amazing grace.

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God Bless America…

Patriotic Storm - American Flag  - Lightning S...

Patriotic Storm – American Flag – Lightning Strikes (Photo credit: Striking Photography by Bo Insogna)

National Day of Prayer. Oh, how this nation needs it.

Father in Heaven,

Forgive us. Forgive us as a nation for our meandering and straying ways. Father, forgive us our trespasses and our apathy and our negligence. Forgive us, Lord, for living for self instead of denying it.

Lord, forgive our disregard for life. Forgive us our deliberate unkindness and aloofness toward our neighbor. Forgive us the inability to love fully and wholly those who are in times of trial.

Forgive us for coveting and desiring what is not ours.

Lord, we are fallen. As a nation we are sinking into an abyss of immorality.  We are consumed by what feels good instead of what is right. Lord, forgive us.

Forgive our nation for innocent blood shed and disregard for human life.

Lord, forgive our nation.

I pray an indwelling of Your Holy Spirit in the hearts of those who are lost. Call on the ‘one’ O, Lord. Shepherd us back to Your heart. Lean in close, Father, that you may hear our cry for peace and grace and mercy. Lord, turn our faces to Yours.

I pray for each unborn child, each miracle created by you. None is a mistake. Lord, I pray for the women afraid and lonely apt to make desperate decisions. Lord, fill them with Your presence. Save the life they carry.

Father, I pray for our leaders. I pray that their decisions would be wise. I pray they would seek to unite our nation. I pray favor for our country.

Father, bless us.

I pray we are united in thanksgiving and love. I pray that we rise up as a nation strong and whole; an example to the world around us.

I pray these things in the Saving name of Jesus. Amen

“Thank You Lord that You will make us a great nation and You will bless this nation, and make our name; and so this nation shall be a blessing. “Genesis 12:2

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His Grace Will Fill You Peacefully…

Template elf

Template elf (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Nighttime meets us with rambling thoughts of ‘what ifs’ and ‘how comes’ and ‘if onlys’. These thoughts enter our mind like elves in the cobblers shop. Working away, instead of fixing, but undoing all the peace and joy of a day. Nighttime brings about that ‘my problems are so large’ feeling. The feeling that creates fear and doubt. I have entertained these elves for a lifetime of nights.  I have spent sleepless hours questioning my purpose and my motives. I thank God for being bigger than my thoughts.

In those deep hours of slumber my mind begins to recount the words I have spoken, the actions I have taken, the thoughts I have. But…just as my focus sharpens on the wrong, the Lord reminds me of the good. He whispers gently in my heart that I have done, in my human condition, much to delight Him. He reminds me of how I have served and loved and encouraged. He gives me a new and joyful perspective. He clears away the doubt and fear and anxiety and lets me rest peacefully in His grace.

That’s what it is…Grace.

When we long to be filled with the Amazing Grace of the Lord, then we are positioning ourselves against attack from the ‘what ifs’ and ‘if onlys’. We are living each day abundantly in His sight. He gives us armor to defend ourselves from lies and deceit from the enemy. Our days are laced in His goodness when we cry out for His mercy and love.

In those deep dark corners of the night when your mind starts to wonder and wander…I urge you to pray the prayer our Lord and Savior plainly taught us….

Our Father who art in Heaven, hallowed be your name. (You are Holy and above all, Creator of all things good…including me.)

Your kingdom come. Your will be done on earth as it is in Heaven. (Help me, Father to be a servant of your mercy and grace.)

Give us this day our daily breath and forgive us our trespasses as we forgive those who trespass against us. (Thank you for provision and forgiveness and the ability to love through Your Son, Jesus Christ.)

Lead us not into temptation but deliver us from evil. (Help me, Father, to possess sound judgment and to walk away from that which makes me stumble.)

For Thine is the kingdom and power and the glory forever. Amen. (I am Yours, now and forever. Amen.)

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On the diamond…

I am a mother to an eight year old ball player who, this year, seems to have figured out the physics and patience of the game of baseball. He wants to lead. He wants to try hard. He wants to encourage. But mostly, He wants to please God. He remarked to me the other day that he is playing, really, for the Lord. He trusts God to give him the ability. He trusts God to instill in him  concentration and endurance. I admire this. Do I trust God this much? Do I confide that He is my all and that He leads my every step?

My son has played, in some fashion, the game of baseball since he was eighteen months. He would toddle out to his batting tee in the back yard with ball and bat in hand and swing away. Proud with his ability to just make contact. He delights in the game. He looks forward to Opening Day. He waits with wide eyed anticipation to see his favorite players hit home

A baseball. Svenska: En baseboll Foto: Tage Olsin

A baseball. Svenska: En baseboll Foto: Tage Olsin (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

runs, catch pop-flies. He always asks, “Mom, do you think he is a Christian?” He believes that ability comes from God. I admire this.

I have learned a lot about God in baseball. Not by the game itself, but by the trust my son has in the Lord each time he hits the field. He knows that God goes before him. He knows that talent is not from his own ability but a gift from God. He knows that each hit and strike give rise to glorifying the Lord. He knows that each play is an opportunity for refinement-to be a good sport. He knows that God’s will is greater than his own. I am encouraged by that.

As an adult I don’t always trust that God is in control. And I repent. I get mixed up in my own wants and desires, I forget that His will is perfect and purposeful. I forget that each hit or strike I make He is refining me and teaching me to be steadfast in Him.

So, each night I am at the field I seek Him. I trust that if, in the details of Little League, He has Max, then in the big details of life, He has me.

Thank you, Jesus!

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Seeking Him…the book

Friends,
I have finished my first book!
It is a collection of devotionals. Forty days.
I pray that it encourages a deeper walk with the Lord.

 

God bless you!

http://store.blurb.com/ebooks/379250-seeking-him

available as an ebook for $2.99 or in print for $30.00

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His Loving Kindness…

Pink Bleeding heart

 

“I have loved you with an everlasting love; I have drawn you with loving kindness.” Jeremiah 31:3

 

These words incase my heart with gold.  To think that the Creator of the Universe loves ME and YOU with an everlasting love. Do you know what that means? It means that no matter how fallen we are, the Lord will always love us. He will never forsake us or leave us or turn from us.  Our poor judgment, bad choices, ill behavior does not turn His heart from us. He draws us to His heart with loving kindness. He forgives.

We are fallen sinners in desperate need of a Savior. We have the gift of a relationship, a personal relationship with the Lord through Jesus Christ.

Take religion out of the equation. Take away the ritual and ceremony of ‘church life’. Take away the way we baptize, marry and even repent. Rid yourself of the weight of it all and come, unburdened, to the Cross. There is nothing that stands between you and a deep, committed, loving relationship with Jesus, save your reluctance and the baggage of the religion of your youth. This relationship is not about how many prayers you pray. It is not about your place in the church. It is intimate and personal and YOURS. Completely and totally yours. The relationship you have with Christ is unique to you and Him.

Come to the Cross. Ask the Lord to forgive your transgressions. Accept that through God the Father Jesus saves us from our sins. Believe that He absorbed all of your inequities on the Cross and that He washed you white as snow. Believe it. It’s that easy. There is no mystery or magic or secret password, there is only Jesus. He is benevolent and kind and Yours. An everlasting love.

Father,
I pray a renewing of faith in my life. I pray that my days would be laced in hope. I pray that I would trust that Your word is true and life-giving. I pray that you would fill me with the Holy Spirit so that I may be assured that my salvation is not contingent on whether or not I am good, but whether or not I believe that you died for my sins. I thank you for the simple gift of salvation. “For you so love the world you gave your only son.” (John 3:16)

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